Tag Archives: healing

Racism, Hatred, Trauma, & the Mind

Interesting thing is: I’m half German. My mom is from Kiel, Germany. She has blonde hair & blue eyes, & is the definition of unconditional love for me. She loved/loves me so much, there was no way I couldn’t fully take on & see how powerful Unconditional Love is. For me it is the ultimate truth. But as a young child, I wasn’t thinking of that sort of thing. All I saw & knew, was what I was learning from people, all people — what I heard them say, what I saw them do. I soon began to see that I had a light brown face, with dark eyes, & dark coarse hair, & I was an outsider. I remember being in school & seeing racist events take place. I remember reading books about the heinous acts that white people committed — I saw it on the evening news as well. There was even racism in my own family, not only on the white side, but on the brown side as well. (Lots of brown people hate themselves, & that leads to hating the ones that look just like them.)

All of this caused so much pain & suffering for me. I was basing my life, my choices, & my development on it. All of it was real, & all of it was painful. And all of it is still here. But I am at the point now where I see it as a story. A story that doesn’t exist — just like the past doesn’t exist.

This week a car crashed into another car, right in front of my apartment building. After impact, one of the cars accidentally jumped over the curb onto the sidewalk & nearly drove straight into my building. I was in the bathroom when this happened. But just the sound of the car crash alone sent me into a traumatic state. It shook every cell in my body for a split second. I felt death, I felt terror, I felt suffering, I felt fear. And this was triggered only by a sound! Remember, I couldn’t see anything because I was in a closed room. The reason that a simple sound can send me into a state of panic like that is because I experienced it in the past — I lived it. I was in a serious car crash, so I know first hand what that sound is, & I know how it feels. But the truth is: it happened 15 years ago, yet I still live a tiny part of it everyday, & on some days, like when I heard that sound, I re-live all of it.

It’s like that vinyl record I mentioned in a previous blog post, you can’t help but to play a tune that has been etched in your soul. The good news is: at this point, I see that there is a way to change that. It can be changed, with Awareness. If I just notice — notice that the song, or the story, or the past is playing. If I can catch it & say: “Ah, I know this tune! It’s just notes. All it is, is notes.” If I do that, I can play another tune, or I can enjoy the silence & love what is in THIS MOMENT. What is present now. How it feels to be alive now. How it feels to love now. How it feels to be grateful for what is happening in the present, right now. — What a difference that is! Don’t you think?!

So I think real healing comes when you can love it all. When you can say: “Oh, I’m thinking something that isn’t true”, or “I’m feeling feelings that are based on my thoughts”, or “I’m in the past (or future) & not in the present, for what it is now” — & then effortlessly & gently bring oneself to a place where it feels safe, at peace, & whole.

Healing is a beautiful thing, but you have to think that the process is beautiful too, otherwise, how are you going to get there? Have patience for not only your process, but for everyone’s process. We are all healing. And we are all waking up to the power of Unconditional Love. As well as the power of truly being alive — which can happen only in the present.

The two videos I featured are of the work of Byron Katie. To say that her work is powerful is an understatement. She speaks & gives clarity on every topic that you can imagine.

If you would like to see a short film on the life of Hitaji (the woman in the first video, who later attended Byron Katie’s school as a guest), here is a link to download it: Hitajis-Journey.

To see part 2 & part 3 of the “Fear of War” video from Israel, click here & here.

If you would like to see other videos from Byron Katie on other topics click here or here.

The amazing illustrations are artwork by Michelle Forsyth. Visit her website for more details & a full view of her trauma painting series.



no words — just love & silence

I have no words for this Sunday’s post. Something tells me that today is about silence: a moment to love & to simply listen.

The same something that tells me not to write, is the same something that tells me to leave you with a few videos from David R. Hawkins.

See you next week.

— Love you.



Why walk when you can fly?

you can fly

This blog post was written in September of 2008.

Interesting how I stumbled upon someone I didn’t know existed this week. Her words and face caught my attention in a Bikram yoga studio dressing room. Someone left a magazine face down on the shelf above mine in the dressing room. While undressing I couldn’t take my eyes off of her words or face. She was beautiful, and next to her face read, “Why walk when you can fly?” Her name was Isha. A day later I looked her up on the Internet. Two things happened. I saw a picture of her retreat center in Uruguay. It looks just like the business I dreamt of for myself. I have had visions of seeing myself in a work place, and this one looks very similar. (Except there is a circular reception desk in my dream, and I don’t see that in her pictures.) Her focus is self-love, that is what she teaches. Hmmm, interesting. In a way that is my focus too. (My focus is love and I believe you experience it when you have unconditional love for yourself first, then that reflects on others & everything around you, leading to no separation, only oneness.) I then wanted to see what she was like, how she sounded, what she talks about exactly. I looked her up on YouTube.  After five minutes of hearing her I stated to cry. I felt like someone was articulating my feelings better than I can. This is exactly how I felt when I started to study Vedanta with swamis. It was a moment of clarity and pure joy. My life was never the same after that. I was changed forever. After that moment, I had hope, I wanted to live, I wanted to serve. I had found myself in my own words written down thousands of years ago by seers. They could say what I could only feel. That was in 1999. I feel like that again after hearing Isha speak.



YOU :)


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When it Resonates

mother-earthI’ve been reading quite a bit over the last week. Several sources had a paragraph that  really resonated with me. Here are two about physical and spiritual health;

“..Absolutely! I think anything in our life is a reflection of the whole world. I mean if we look at just our body, we are mother earth incarnate. We are made of soil. We are made of water, the rivers, and our blood flow through us. To really understand that, if we heal ourselves and how we live our lives, we heal the planet. And if we heal the planet, we heal ourselves.   ..The earth is ever abundant, ever giving, ever loving; and our bodies are unconditionally very supportive to that kind of healing if we could really learn to honor ourselves, our sacred temple. What a gift that would be. If everybody can do that, we would automatically heal the planet. “Lydia Kindheart

“.. But fasting is not only a question of abstaining from physical food. It is also a question of renouncing certain thoughts and feelings which weigh us down. Instead of always trying to take: to absorb, devour, and accumulate things, we have to learn to give: to give up things and to free ourselves. It is the accumulation of excess baggage that pulls us downwards.”Omraam M. Aivanhov

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[Email to a friend]

From: AimeeLovesYou
Subject: FLY
Date: Dec 28, 2008

I haven’t gotten back into the groove with reciting my goal list daily. I will still make this a habit and get back to this.

One thing I read that really helped me this week was;

“..the hummingbird is not supposed to be able to fly given the shape and weight of it’s body…”

I thought WOW, how f*ckin’ cool is that! I’m not sure if I mentioned anything about my researching hummingbirds this year, the the universe has hit me over the head with it. Hummingbirds and their symbolism has followed me to the point were I knew it had a message for me and I had to look into it. Here is what I found…

HUMMINGBIRD– A symbol of joy, love an beauty

*Stopper of time
*Represents optimism and sweetness
*Being able to roll with the punches

“The hummingbird darts lightly through the world, spreading its message of joy and beauty, teaching us to appreciate the wonder and magic of everyday existence. It teaches you how to live in joy and peace.”

It is able to fly, to be a messenger of joy, love, and beauty, even though it is (scientifically!) not supposed to be able to fly?!
When I am hard on myself about my weight or shape, when I am not loving myself enough, when I am stressed about losing time, ..I have forgotten that I can fly, that I am capable of anything! That I am not limited. That life has called me and I need to respond to life’s call, life’s invitation! It is what I am here for. No worries about looking good, ‘fitting the part’, or having enough (time, etc..). -Make time, make it look good, make it fit, have gratitude and see the beauty. See the beauty as it is right now. -Love your self!

Happy holidays…

I love you,
PS, Another funny thing,.. I got an email from a friend this morning that only had three letters in it,.. “FLY”.

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“Hey everyone, there’s more!”

[ Conversation online between me & a friend.]

Friend: …I watched the number of people contacting me go from 2 or so a day to zero.

AimeeLoveYou: Maybe it means that those people would have wasted precious time. Time meant for you to work on your healing. Maybe your honesty was really for you. Maybe you needed to be ‘matched up’ with your self, to fall in love with the real you.

Friend: It’s incredible really. Do people want you to lie to them? It’s as if someone farted and the room has just emptied out.

AimeeLovesYou: Of course they walked out! Who wants to ‘be’ with it? No one wants to know that they need to wake up. That they have become a Robot. That their life (choices) are on automatic. That they no longer think and feel for themselves. You are a reminder of that, your XXXX is a reminder of that. You are a reminder of, “Hey everyone, there’s more!” That’s scary to a lot of people.

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